Killing Pain
Understanding the Opioid Pandemic and the American Obsession With Oxycontin, Heroin, and Other Painkillers
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Discover 'Killing Pain': A Journey of Hope and Recovery
Welcome to the world of "Killing Pain," where I, Robert Hayward, invite you to join me on a journey of hope and recovery.
I'm not just an author; I'm a counselor, a recovering addict, and a passionate advocate for those fighting the battle of addiction. My latest creation, "Killing Pain," is more than just a book; i...
Understanding the Opioid Epidemic: Get Educated
I want to share some crucial information about the opioid epidemic and why it's essential to get educated.
Opioid overdose is now the leading cause of death for men between 18 and 45 years old in the United States. The rise of fentanyl, a synthetic opioid that is 400 times deadlier than heroin, is driving these ...
Killing Pain Reviews
Killing Pain; Understanding the Opioid Pandemic and the American Obsession with Oxycontin, Heroin, and Other and Other Painkillers
Robert Hayward, the author of Killing Pain, introduces himself as an addict during Narcotics Anonymous and Wellbriety meetings. In his memoir, he provides a candid and powerful account of the opioid epidemic in America. Hayward shares his struggle with addiction, addressing the roots of the crisis and focusing on society's preoccupation with painkillers like OxyContin and heroin. Through his narrative, he not only offers a cautionary message but also invites readers to follow his journey to redemption. Hayward takes readers on a gripping exploration of his addiction to hydrocodone, OxyContin, and other opioids. With raw and unapologetic storytelling, he immerses readers in the chaotic and destructive world of addiction, from the initial euphoria to the perilous consequences of uncontrolled dependency.
Hayward's book, Killing Pain, stands out for its ability to offer a firsthand perspective on the opioid experience. It examines the internal struggles and unrelenting pursuit of the next fix, presenting a raw and evocative narrative that captures both the highs and lows of addiction. This powerful memoir not only provides a personal account but also serves as an informative resource on the complexities of opioid dependency. Hayward sheds light on the role of the pharmaceutical industry, specifically Perdue Pharma's introduction of OxyContin and its devastating impact on the nation. The narrative adeptly navigates the timeline of the opioid epidemic, revealing the collusion of doctors, the proliferation of pain clinics, and the emergence of synthetic opioids such as fentanyl.
Killing Pain is a story of hope and renewal instead of despair. It follows Hayward's journey to rock bottom and subsequent recovery, providing a glimmer of optimism and showcasing the potential for redemption. This exceptionally well-written book compels readers to face the harsh realities of addiction and challenges their preconceived notions about addicts. It portrays them as complex individuals grappling with a disease rather than mere stereotypes. Killing Pain is an enlightening and captivating memoir that will resonate with those affected by addiction, clinicians working with addicts, and anyone seeking to understand the origins of the opioid pandemic. It serves as a poignant reminder that despite the devastating impact of addiction, there is always the possibility of recovery. A book that informs, instructs, and creates a strong awareness about a pandemic that is causing a lot of harm to human life, this memoir is a must-read
A man plumbs the depths in a struggle with opioid addiction in this searing memoir.
Hayward was sober after decades of heavy drinking and owned a swimming pool construction business in Southern California when, in the early 2000s, he started taking the opioid OxyContin for back pain. The drug eliminated the pain and induced a euphoric high, but while it was touted as nonaddictive, it proved quite the opposite. The author was soon snorting huge quantities every day to appease his craving; stealing money from his company to support his habit, which he fed with prescriptions and illicit street purchases; and alienating his family and employees with his manic bluster. A medical detox regimen got him clean, but he immediately relapsed and plunged further into chaos, including an incident in which he accidentally spilled his OxyContin pills into the pit underneath an outhouse-and dove in to retrieve them. Hayward finally went cold turkey at his isolated ranch in the Sierras, whereupon the memoir becomes a squalid but gripping story of wilderness survival. Snowed in at a freezing cabin with bears prowling outside, he endured horrific withdrawal symptoms-"I was crying, tears falling, snot dropping from my nose, drool from my mouth, throw up in my mouth, yellow/orange vomit shooting out in the front, black liquid squirting out from behind"—that sapped his will to live. The author's account lays bare the dynamics of opioid dependency, from the corrupt collusion of doctors in promoting addiction to the egotism and hubris of addicts in imagining they can control their habits. His prose is vivid and evocative in conveying the rush of opioid highs "The colors of the forest and lake were vivid and pulsating....I sat on a boulder and wallowed in my addiction, exhilarated beyond ecstasy, a whole body and mind orgasm throbbed through my entire mind, body, and what was left of my soul"-and unsparing on the relentless taskmasters the drugs become. ("They turn you into a robot-going through life's motions, yet everything revolves around your next dose, next hit, next snort, next visit to the doctor or dealer, the endless counting and recounting of pills.") When Hayward finally writes of gleaning hope from God, his redemption feels authentic and moving.
An engrossing account of degradation and hard-fought recovery.
- Kirkus Reviews